Want to Get Better and Have More Fun?

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Below are fifty rules/guidelines/recommendations I have collected during the past three years as a CrossFit addict. Trust me, it doesn’t mean I do all of them. Do as I say, not as I do. Isn’t that the way it is supposed to work?

 

  1. Make Under Armour a liar every WOD. Shirt can’t wic away awesome! It means you should give every WOD your all and leave nothing in the tank.
  2. Finish the round. Doesn’t matter what the clock says. It matters that you finish.
  3. Failing on a rep is good. If you aren’t failing, you aren’t pushing.
  4. Squat, Dead lift, Press, Bench, and sadly running too, should be done every week.
  5. Keep your gym bag stocked and in your car.
  6. PVC Pipe, lacrosse ball, field hockey ball, giant bands, should be in your living room for all to see.
  7. Mobility is a WOD, one you can do seven days a week
  8. Coffee, unsalted butter and coconut oil = breakfast
  9. Tequila, a juiced lime, and a salted rim = happy hour!
  10. Don’t take it too seriously…see rule above
  11. Food doesn’t have ingredients listed on a label
  12. Join a farm Co-op. Best vegetables you will get, hands down.
  13. Buy a cow, then eat the cow
  14. Visit other boxes often
  15. Do the whole warm up like it’s your favorite WOD.
  16. Show up ten minutes earlier than you normally would
  17. Stay fifteen minutes later than you normally would
  18. Athletic tape, wrist wraps, knee sleeves, oly shoes, jump rope, nanos/innov8’s. Buy the toys because they are the tools of the trade.
  19. Don’t be the no rep person….
  20. Introduce yourself to all drop ins and newbies. You were one too
  21. Chalk makes you stronger
  22. Once in a while, forget what you know, and do it EXACTLY like the coach tells you
  23. Kill Cliff, Progenex, coconut water, whole food, whatever your post WOD plan is, just make sure you have one. Need to rehydrate and feed the machine
  24. Your Box has a sticker, I am sure,…put one on your car and help advertise
  25. Sweat angels are beautiful
  26. Coming close to throwing up is ok
  27. Double unders suck. Get over it. Practice them
  28. There are no quick fixes
  29. Supplements do not replace real food
  30. Clean up your stuff. Bars go on a rack. Clips go in a bucket. Plates either go on a tree or on a stack. KB’s and DB’s have a shelf.
  31. Always smile, even when the coach puts up 800m Med Ball Indian run for the warm up. Coaches are people too….they make mistakes.
  32. The coach doesn’t want to hear you bitch.
  33. It’s Saturday at 800am, a few people are hungover. Don’t call them out. It’s not cool. They know they drank last night…..and so does everyone else.
  34. A “nice job” or a high five go a very long way with new members and drop ins
  35. F&*K cliques. The Box is a team. Support everyone.
  36. Take different classes so you get different coaches
  37. WOD/running/swimming early in the morning ensures a good night’s sleep
  38. Be truthful with scores, don’t cheat yourself
  39. Pick a goal every month and then work on it every time you are in the box. Even when you are beat and want to go home.
  40. Coffee is the lifeblood that drives success!!!!
  41. Tequila seems to always take things up a notch…..
  42. Bacon makes everything better….just try not to eat it at every meal
  43. Progenex, aka, awesome-sauce is the best tasting protein ever. It’s also expensive, however it’s worth it if it helps you recover faster
  44. Fish oil fixes just about everything. Creaky joints, good for the heart, etc. Take lots of it. You’ll know when you have had too much.
  45. Don’t let the muscle between you ears be the strongest one. It’s the only part of you that knows how much the bar/kb/db weighs.
  46. Listen to the coach when they tell you it’s too much weight. Putting yourself in danger to do it Rx is silly.
  47. Leave the music alone. Owner and coaches get to change it. Nobody else.
  48. Take three to five minutes to get your head right before you get out of the car. Work stays in the car. Life stays in the car. This is all about you.
  49. Don’t worry about 100% pale…do what works for you. Your are the expert on how you feel.
  50. Sign up for local competitions. Good way to meet people and you will do way more when you are in front of a crowd than when you are doing a regular WOD. Waaaaaaaayyy more.

Who has some more recommendations?

 

 

 

 

 

 

2014 CrossFit Open

Here we go Again!

Here we go Again!

Better late than never! i thought i had posted this last week!

It was here and then it was gone….The 2014 Open is over and thankfully we didn’t have 150 wall balls again!  Hard to believe the five weeks flew by so quickly. I thought this years’s WOD’s were great. The first two were challenging to say the least however they were scalable and doable for those who don’t have double unders or chest to bar pull ups. I didn’t get a chance to do 14.3 however a box jump is the quickest way to kill a dead lift WOD. Not all agree obviously, as folks from the box absolutely annihilated it. That’s you Luke Espe. We done. 14.4 was also great, I scaled it as well, however I completed all 200 reps and got a great workout. That is what it is all about. Don’t Rx if it will take an hour to complete it. Scale it so it is challenging and you wind up in the fetal position on the floor, looking for Mommy to give you an ice pop and make it all better. 14.5 was a great way to end the Open. No time cap. You. Had. To. Finish. It. Somebody scheduled burpees for Tuesday’s WOD. That wasn’t right.

Pretty sick that  much hat 209,000 people signed up for the Open this year. (http://games.crossfit.com/article/209585-rise-open) Multiply that by $20.00…and well somebody is happy. Cha Ching! Usual names in the top spots, no shock there. They are robots. Sick, sick robots who don’t stop. Great to see folks from CrossFit BWI and Syndicate excel and I know several people are headed to regionals, which means a lot of us will be going as well to cheer them on. It’s all about the community with CrossFit. It is a team sport and the home team always wins.

So, what did I learn from this year’s Open?

Burpee Bar Jump Overs:

Those are quite possibly worse then TGU’s. That was a huge achilles heel for me and why I didn’t do Rx. Need to work on those big time. So what did I talk about after our experience at The Capital Throwdown? Train like you are going to compete. Do everything to the standard. What this means is any time burps come up, do them over the bar. Might as well since they will come up again I am sure!

Double Unders:

I need to finally get these. Of course I have no idea why I don’t have them yet. I never practice them and always jump right to two to one or three to one anytime they come up. You know how that ends. I am really good and efficient at single unders and can rip off 100 unbroken without issue. Of course that also means I still don’t have double unders. This is the year!

Overhad Squats:

Need to work these more because they are hard….and they suck….a lot. Practice makes perfect.

Make the Reps Count:

Power Snatch doesn’t only mean snatch. it’s a good way saying shoulder to overhead as well. Saw a lot of people using this in the first WOD and I made them all snatches. That means I got less reps. Sometimes it’s not about the name, it’s about finding the best LEGAL way to get the most reps. Same here for step ups vs box jumps. Save the shins and step up on that puppy!

All in all it was a great open. I am happy I did it again this year and I’ll do it again next year!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Level One Certification Weekend

CrossFit

CrossFIt has been a part of my life for almost three years and I am still drinking the Kool-Aid full blast.  Lately I have been in a funk and have not been going to many classes, and not going all out when I did attend class, so it was definitely time for a jump-start. I decided it was time to obtain the $1,000 T-shirt! Level One Trainer Certification. Luckily CrossFit Federal Hill was hosting a seminar so I didn’t have to travel far. Surprisingly it took a few weeks to sell out, which I thought was odd, considering it was the first one in this area. I signed up early and got in the proper mode for studying! Procrastination.

Shortly after I paid the fee I received the Level One training guide. I read through it twice before the class. It is pretty basic and a lot of it is pictures which always helps the reading go faster. I saved it to ibooks which made it easier to read. A lot of the things I already knew, maybe I just didn’t practice. Some of us squat below parallel and some of us don’t. I definitely suggest you read through the guide a few times. 

I got there early Saturday morning and there were already several people there ahead of me. Everyone was still in their car in the parking lot, reading the training guide or just waiting. Anticipation was in the air, as was caffeine, beards, and black sports cars.  The trainers arrived in a minivan and all piled out…and it was game on.

The class was definitely organized. Everyone lined up, and filtered through the sign in table. Within twenty to thirty minutes, everyone was signed in and was seated and ready for class to begin. The trainers were very engaging, from the beginning they were quick to introduce themselves and let everyone know what would happen next. I would encourage any corporate trainers or event organizers to attend a Level One Cert. They trainers made sure to talk to people who were seated on the outside and it was clear it was to keep people seated, and keep anyone from wandering off. Really well done. 

The first day was a mix of one hour lectures and then small group work. Ten people to a trainer. The heaviest thing we lifted was a PVC pipe, however I was wiped out and sore as hell the next day. The trainers were all very passionate about correct form and made sure everyone got some one on one time, pointing out opportunities and ways to get better form and maximize efficiency. The lectures were all very informative and the format followed the training guide. My suggestion is to take notes on what the trainers write on the whiteboard, and what they repeat. If they say it twice, it will be on the test.

The WOD the first day was pretty tough. Thrusters and Burpees, nobody likes either of them, except sick people, and together they are even worse. But hey, we don’t pay the dues to lay up. I went in the third heat which was a mistake. Should have gotten it out of the way. I think was the last to finish, which was totally not what I wanted, but it happens. Definitely a lot of people cheering, which is nice. it is what it is. Move on. Everybody stuck around for a few beers afterwards. I have yet to attend a dry CrossFit event! 

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The second day was similar to the first. Lecture, group work, lecture…etc. The format followed the training guide. Sunday’s WOD was a little better. Med ball cleans, push ups, and sit ups. We covered nutrition and programming in the afternoon. I would have liked more time on the programming aspect of CrossFit. I’ll have to check and see if there is another seminar on that topic.

The test was challenging. Read your notes and read the manual. I would also suggest doing a quick Google search on CrossFit Level One Cert flash cards. There are several sites that offer flash cards. It would have been nice to have thirty minutes before the test to read through everything.

I would definitely suggest the course to anyone who needs a jump-start or is looking to expand their CrossFit knowledge and understanding. I don’t think you will find a better group of trainers. James, Joey, EC, Cameron, Dave, Melody, and Sarah were all very knowledgable, motivated, and engaging. Definitely looking forward to staying in touch with all of them. 

Tips; 

* Read the manual

* Write it down when the trainer repeats it or when they write it on the whiteboard

* Search for flash cards

* Read all of your notes Sunday morning and Sunday during the lunch break!

Trying and finishing last beats not trying every time!

Trying and finishing last beats not trying every time!

Playground Etiquette

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Yes. That’s right. I called it a playground. We jokingly refer to the gear as “toys”. We all have our own favorite “spot” on the playground where we are stronger, or gravity is weaker, or it gives us a better look at the clock…or some of the other members. Beware. I’ve had a little too much coffee today and I’m hungry. Those of you who know me, know that is not a good combination.

I think it is time to instill some eitiquette guidelines….actually, no,…straight up rules. You break them. Burpees, followed by more burpees, with a cash out of pistols and TGU’s. Seriously, your Mom doesn’t work there and if she does you are old enough to clean up after yourself. Turd.

CrossFit Rook’s Rules of Conduct:

Show up on time. “On Time” means ten to fifteen minutes early so you can fill you water bottle, tape what needs taped, get your shoes, wraps, bands, chalk, and whatever else you need in order to kick the WOD square in the tail. Class starts at the posted time. That doesn’t mean you waltz in at that time and then do your stuff.

Do the Whole Warm Up:

I am guilty of this, big time. Starting October 1, it is a short term goal to do the whole warm up. Even it if is an 800M Indian Run which in my opinion have no place whatsover in a warm up. Anything more than 400 is too much. It’s a warm up for the workout, not a workout before the workout.

Introduce Yourself:

Say good morning or hello to people whom you do not recognize and introduce yourself. Good rule of thumb is if you don’t know them, they probably don’t know you either. See how that works? In most cases they are fellow torture lovers who usually attend different class times. In other cases they may be a drop in which means they are traveling, staying in a hotel, eating crappy food, and are away from their friends and family. A cheerful greeting and handshake go a long way.

Don’t Complain:

The WOD’s are challenging and generally suck. We don’t pay a sum of money equal to a car payment in order to be instructed on how to complete cable curls and the pec deck. Of course they are hard. Of course they are going to be difficult. That’s the point.

Depending on who does the programming, and what model they are following, there may be some repetitive stuff. Now you’ll get better at it. A good example was earlier this week. We had J.T. which is a hero WOD, and could mean just triceps. Two days later we had close grip bench and wall runs. My shoulders and tris were jello. Now they’ll come back stronger, probably in three to six weeks.

Listen, then ask Questions:

The Coach will go through the WOD, the movements, the rep counts, the whole thing. At least give them the courtesy of being quiet and attentive. Let them go through everything before you ask questions, unless of course, they ask if anyone has questions. That would be a good time to ask.

Give 100% and be Honest:

Don’t scale to get a faster time and don’t short count reps. That’s B freakin’ S. Scale if you really can’t do the movement or the weight, or if you have been hitting it hard and need more of an active rest WOD than a beast maker. Talk to the Coach, they will be able to help you determine what is the right substitute. Short counting reps is the equivalent of taking money out of the collection plate at church. Don’t cheat!

Cheer on your Fellow Twisted CrossFitters:

What is the best way to cool down after a WOD? Cheering for those who are not yet done. Awesome work, you killed it, now go talk the new person or drop in through the rest of their WOD.

Put Away Your Toys:

The primary reason I don’t do the whole warm up? I go to 6:00am class and I spend the first ten minutes or so cleaning up the stuff that was left out from the day before. Bands still hanging from the pull up bars. Bumper plates left against the wall from HSPU. Barbells left on the rack from squatting. Rollers, ab mats, water bottles, weight belts……

Clean up after yourself. Put your stuff away where it belongs when you are done. If something was where it wasn’t supposed to be when you got there, and it’s still there when you are ready to leave, guess what? Put it away. Please. With Progenex on top. And maybe a pair of Hylete shorts on the side. Come on people. Legally, you are adults. Give others a hand in putting their stuff away as well.

Ring the Bell:

We have a bell that hangs from the wall. Ring it when you hit a PR or hit a “first”. Celebrate the win. Good attention is good. Miley Cyrus attention is bad. Really bad. No twerking.

Stretch/Roll/Cool Down:

You just spent 20 – 40 minutes tearing muscle fibers, driving your heart rate through the roof, and all in all, beating the total hell out of your yourself. Take five to ten minutes and cool down. Get a roller and hit the quads and upper back. Grab a band and hit the lats, chest, shoulders, hamstrings and calves. Hips are probably a good idea as well. Water or coconut water works wonders.

Drink the Kool-Aid:

Go all in. Give 100% if you expect to get 100% in return. That does not mean you have to drop $150 on strength shoes or buy out Lululemon before your first class, however it does mean you should become a student of the game. Countless websites offer a veritable cornucopia of free information about CrossFit and everything that goes into it. Spend fifteen to thirty minutes a day reading about CrossFit and all of the fun stuff that goes with it like Trigger Point, Paleo, Zone, Olympic LIfting, etc. and of course, reading CrossFit Rook.

Hit it hard today.

CrossFit Rook

It’s not About Throwing Darts and Hoping

“So Champ what was going through your mind when you were getting ready for tonight’s fight?”

“I just got in the ring and did’t have a plan. I winged it and it worked out. I also focused on every missed opportunity and failure and knew I would lose.”

Seem strange? It should. This interview would never happen. Ever! High level athletes, CEO’s, titans of the universe, successful soccer Moms all share the same mindset. Positive mental attitude. They talk about visualizing success and being in the zone. They see good things happen ahead of time and focus on the positives. There aren’t problems. There are only solvable challenges. We didn’t get all caffeinated and dressed up for a walk in the park.

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Tips to Maximize Your Performance:

Tracking:

I work for a financial services company and we track every possible metric known to man. Many times we experience paralysis through analysis. It’s easy to go overboard; however by minimally tracking your performance for repeated lifts and met-cons you will have a baseline for comparison. Take notes on each WOD, listing both your weakness and your strength. Also take notes on what you think you could have done differently what would have improved your performance. For example, $5.00 bottomless margaritas and hitting the nacho bar the night before may not have been a great idea. Another example might be skimping on the warm up. And no, I don’t know anywhere local who has $5.00 bottomless margaritas.

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Goal Setting:

Keep your goals realistic. A sub three minute Fran is not realistic for a beginner, or for someone who is weak on pull ups and thrusters. Educated goal setting is possible when you keep track of your WOD’s and weights. Pushing for a PR should be a goal for just about every class. Remember that it doesn’t have to be ten or twenty pounds either. Two pounds is still a PR. The little plates are there so use them. Most importantly, talk to the coach. Ask them what they think. They aren’t there because they were bored an needed something to do. Good coaches want to see you succeed.

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Planning your Performance in the WOD:

Don’t wait for class to figure out how you will attack the WOD. Most boxes post the WOD the night before. Read through it and compare it to other WOD’s you have done. Constant variation is the foundation of CrossFit, however a clean is a clean and pull ups are pull ups. Put together a plan. Say it’s Grace. Are you capable of cleaning and jerking 135lbs thirty times unbroken? Probably not. However, are you able to do three sets of ten unbroken, with ten to fifteen seconds of rest between sets? How about five sets of six? Break them up into smaller sets so you do not get burned out. Doing Olympic lifts when you are overly fatigued equals crappy form and injuries. Do it right or drop the weight. Do not sacrifice form for time. Your chiropractor enjoys the business but your Box still collects the dues and you won’t be there to enjoy the class.

Competition:

Find someone who is of equal or slightly higher caliber than yourself and has the same schedule. They are now your workout buddy. It is a good idea to make sure they are ok with it. Stalking is a chargeable crime in several states. It is friendly competition. Don’t spike their pre workout drink or hide their strength shoes. That ain’t right! You will push them and they will push you. In the end you both win. Partner up on strength WOD’s and expect big increases in weights.

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Mental Attitude:

You’ve got the gear and are all warmed up and ready to go. Don’t let the muscle between your ears be the weakest muscle. Too many times people can take a trip to negative town, focusing on how much something will suck or only focusing on the part of the WOD which will be very difficult for them to complete. Try not to talk yourself out of it before you even try. No negative Nancy’s. Visualize yourself being successful on every lift and getting through every met-con.

Post WOD Planning:

Cool down. Stretch. Hydrate. Eat. Try to plan your exit strategy to include these four items. You just beat the hell out of yourself and more than likely will be on your way to work, a meeting, running errands, kid’s games, etc. Ideally we would be able to do all of this stuff, then go home and take a nap. Probably not going to happen, so plan to do these before you leave the box. Come prepared with coconut water and a solid post WOD meal or a protein shake. Mix it up and determine what works the best for you: solid foods, protein shake, regular water, coconut water, etc.

Rest Days and Yoga:

One of the dumbest phrases every uttered by knuckleheads. “Yoga isn’t a workout.” Yes it most certainly is. Definitely do it once or twice a week if your box offers the class. If not, find a place that does and pay for the classes. We spend three to five days a week beating ourselves to a pulp. Yoga works out the kinks, releases tension in the muscles, and gets things back in line so you can beat it up again the following week. It is great to do on your rest days. Make sure you take one to two a week as needed. If you feel like crap you’ll perform poorly. Fact.

The dues are expensive. So is the gear. Embrace the suck by being prepared for the WOD and being ready to go. Post WOD is as important as pre WOD. How you feel has a direct influence on how you perform. Don’t short change yourself and lay off the margaritas.

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What Happened to August? What Happened to Summer?

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Hey, what happened to August? It was the first and then it was Labor Day in the blink of an eye! What gives? I haven’t written a post in over a month which is odd. Too busy sucking up the last drop of Summer…….Shandy. It was a great Summer and I am sorry to see it come to an end. Cookouts, pool party’s, trips to the beach. Mostly done for another year. The good news is Autumn is upon us. Football, brats, and cooler temps! Definitely my favorite season.

August was a good month. Definitely learned a lot and made some progress.

100 Day Burpee Challenge:
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What a wonderful challenge. Day one, one burpee. Day two, two burpees and on and on it goes. Miss a day? The next day you do those as well. Miss day 25? Good news is you have 51 to complete the following day. Kylie and I are on day 33. Doubtful I will make 100 days however I will go as far as I can. Definitely learned about pacing and foot placement. It’s better to have your feet under your hips when coming up. Wide feet equal a sore lower back.

I have had wrist issues so I have been taping my wrists. Some argue it is a little overboard. They are welcome to their opinion. I like tape and use plenty of it. I have noticed my wrists feel better so it’s working. I have also focused on putting my weight on my fingers instead of entirely on he heel of my hand.

CrossFit Total: I finished at 940 which is about ten to fifteen pounds less than last time. Squat was off because my knee was off. It feels better since I have been back in rehab and following the advice of well educated and trained medical professionals. Interesting how that happened. According to my Mom I am not stubborn, I am obstinate. I think I’m stubborn and don’t understand what she means. September will be dedicated to getting back to 100%.

Hotshots 19 WOD: https://hotshots19.crossfit.com/

CROSSFIT’S MEMORIAL WOD
Show your support by attending the memorial event in Prescott, or host the workout locally on August 31st and donate online.

AUG

31
“Hotshots 19”

Six rounds for time of:
30 Squats
135 pound Power clean, 19 reps
7 Strict Pull-ups
Run 400 meters

This is still fresh in my mind since we just completed it less than 48 hours ago. Quite possibly the toughest WOD I have attempted. Do not under estimate this beast. It may not look daunting on the white board…..you are wrong. Six rounds of “am i done yet?” Do not go towards the light. You won’t die, you’ll pass out first.

One of the trainers pointed out that I was bouncing the bar off my upper thigh during the clean, which I refer to as a reverse curl. This is not the first time she has told me this, nor is it the second or third time. We should consider it a recurring theme. So, instead of continuing to do it my way, incorrectly, I took her advice and shrugged more, and what do you know? Again, taking advice from a well trained professional paid off big dividends. Interesting how that happened. Refer to the previous paragraph referencing stubbornness.

You can get through anything and you should listen to your trainers. They know what they are doing. Unless they have 800 meter med ball runs in the warm up. Obviously they are delirious and require medical attention.

Whole Life Challenge: http://www.wholelifechallenge.com

We are getting ready for our third run. We are currently 100% Paleo 80% of the time so it won’t be a big change for us. It really only results in a reduction of weekend beverages which is fine. We are looking forward to it. We always find some great new recipes and always come out feeling better and performing better at the end. We’ll be on vacation for one of the weeks which means we’ll have to stockpile points!

Selected for Athletes of the Month: http://crossfitbwi.com/2013/08/30/augsept-athletes-of-the-month-robert-and-kylie-taylor/

This was a huge honor for Kylie and I. CrossFit has had a significant impact on our lives and we can’t imagine not being a part of it in the future. It is a team sport and we have a great team at CrossFit BWI and CrossFit Syndicate.

Heading out to the box shortly to have some quality time with Cindy. I hate Cindy. Just kidding, I love Cindy.

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You Might be Addicted to CrossFit

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CrossFit is addictive for several reasons, primarily because members see results, it’s fun, and it’s kind of counter culture. We do stuff most people don’t want to try because they have been programmed to believe the only way to get in shape is by eating 1,200 to 1,500 calories a day, doing sixty minutes of cardio on a stair master and doing high reps with light weight. It is possible to get addicted and if you fit any of the scenarios below, welcome to the club.

“This one time at CrossFit.” It’s all you ever talk about for starters!

Dropping $65.00 on a pair of shorts in which you will only sweat is no big deal. “Look! they have green too!”

Nanos, Innov-8’s, Romaleos, Chucks. You have at least one pair of each, probably two, because they were on “sale”. There is no more room on the floor in your closet.

You can’t walk without wincing, your shoulders are pulled to your ears, can’t unclinch your hands, however you find out tomorrow’s WOD is Fran. Of course you are going. It’s only your eighth day in a row. You’ll rest when you are dead.

Bank statement reads Reebok e-commerce, Zappos, Progenex, Lulu-lemon, Main Street butcher, and Juan’s house of tequila……because its Paleo!

Hear the name Eva and you don’t think of Mendes or Longoria, sadly. Your face contorts while contemplating a 2.5 mile run and 150 pull ups and KB swings.

There is more than one picture of you performing a HSPU or pistols somewhere other than the box, like a bar. Because you are hardcore and nothing brings out hardcore like a happy hour gone awry. This is more out of jealousy because I can’t do either.

Your charm bracelet has a barbell, a dumbbell, a Kettlebell, a tire, Rx, and a steak.

You’ve had to buy a bigger lunch box……more than once.

To everyone else Memorial Day sleeping in, pool time, and BBQ’s. You’ve got a date with Murph and it better not last more than 45 minutes. If it goes over an hour…..don’t think about that!

You’ve checked Community by-laws and discovered there is no specific language regarding tire flips. GAME ON! Maybe they’ll let you store them in the pool house!

You’ve been invited by your chiropractor to attend their child’s high school graduation party. It’s only fair, you’ve practically paid their tuition.

There is a lacrosse ball and a field hockey ball in your desk at work. You don’t play and never have.

A co-worker shows up for a meeting six minutes late. Immediately you calculate she owes you thirty burpees.

Shaker bottles have taken over one of your cabinets and they are still multiplying.

First introductions to women named Cindy, Fran, and Diane do not go well.

You’ve purchased half of a grass fed cow and are wondering if you should have bought a bigger freezer and gotten the whole cow.

Callous shavers. One at home, one in your gym bag, one at work. You’ve caught yourself picking at them in meetings and didn’t stop.

I wonder if the neighbors will mind if I put a rower on my patio?

You’re looking for a video of the 21k row, which lasts an hour plus, and you’ll watch the whole thing. Freak

How many jump ropes do I need? I need the one that helps me do Double Unders! Obviously it’s the rope!!! Back off.

I’m not addicted. I can take a rest day anytime I want. I’ll start next week.

In all honesty it’s a great addiction to have focusing on health will always put you ahead. Take rest days otherwise you will get injured and won’t be able to play. Hit it out of the box this week.

CrossFit Rook

CrossFit Dictionary

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If your friends CrossFit, you’ll know it because it’s all they ever talk about! The dictionary below should be useful to those CrossFit or who have friends who CrossFit and have io idea what their friends are talking about. Also good if you need a laugh!

21-15-9: favorite rep scheme for many of the Metcons. 45 reps in total, however it feels more like 450. Always starts out with: “That doesn’t look too bad.”

400M: Stupid, incessantly annoying runs, usually around a building. Best completed while inhaling diesel fumes, or dodging traffic.

6am’ers: Cheery, coffeeholic members who only show up at 6:00am. May be treated as Noobs at weekend classes or clinics, simply because other members do not know they exist. If one shows up at an afternoon class, look out. The world may end. Same can be said if an afternoon regular shows up at a 600am class.

Airdyne/Assault Bike: Ungood all around. Part stationary bike, part punching drills, all nasty. You are doing it right if the sweat dripping off your nose is levitated by the fan spinning. Really doing it right if the sweat comes back at you!

Burpee: Banned by the Geneva Convention in 1899 as unfair punishment. Adored by CrossFit instructors worldwide. Originally named the Squat Thrust by gym coaches. Burpee sounded more friendly. Sadly, we were duped. Squat down, kick your legs back, do a push up, bring your feet to your hands, jump in the air, clap your hands over your head. Repeat. Vomit. Could be used as punishment for politicians who cannot come to an agreement. Burpees until they resolve all outstanding issues.

Cleans: Explosive Olympic lift where you take the bar from the floor to your shoulders by jumping and pulling yourself under the bar. Otherwise known as a reverse curl. Requires lots of practice and should be practiced with a dowel or empty barbel every day.
Tutorial

Double Unders: Fap, ow. Fap, shoot. Fap, Damnit! Fap, how many singles do I sub? The rope passes under your feet twice instead of once. Easier for smaller lighter people. The rest of us look like our legs have been whipped.
Tutorial

Ewwww: Common retort when the WOD is a mix of Turkish Get Ups, Bulgarian Split Squats, Box Jumps, and Burpees

Fem-Bot: Usually starts out with a thought: “She’s cute, I’ll work out next to her.” Turns into “She has more weight on her bar, she’s moving faster, and is completely crushing me. I need to leave, now.” Worst outcome is she’s the trainer. More weight will miraculously appear on your bar if left unattended. She wants to make you better. Your ability to survive the WOD is inconsequential.

Goals: Can’t hit something if you don’t know what it is. Track your progress and set goals for thirty days out. Look at the WOD before you go in and have a plan of the weight you will use along with any substitutions. Talk to the trainer and ask if they agree.

Hand Stand Push Ups: It starts with getting upside down and the putting your feet against the wall. Then lower your head to the floor and push yourself up. Good times. You will fall. Everyone does. HSPU is the warning, I mean abbreviation.
Progression Tutorial

Innov-8’s: Minimalist running shoe favored by CrossFitters because of the simple design and low heel height. Surprisingly more expensive than regular sneakers even though they have less material. Cool color combinations, which is handy because you’ll have several pair. Addict.

Jerk: Pushing the barbels over head by dropping under the bar and straightening you arms and engaging your shoulders. I have been accused of completing a push press instead of a jerk. Obviously they can’t see the difference.
Tutorial

Kipping: Pretty much the foundation of the majority of lifts and movements we complete. Explosive hip drive movement. Takes a lot of practice to do it correctly. More commonly used with pull ups. Progression Tutorial

L-sits: Horrible. No idea who came up with them. Incredible for strong arms, shoulders, and core. Starts on the floor with PVC pipe where you kick your legs out in front holding them parallel to the floor. Torso is perpendicular to the floor. Pros do it on the rings. Example

Metcon: We lift weights to get stronger. We lift weights faster for cardio. Short for metabolic conditioning. High intensity cycle consisting of lifts and either running, rowing, or body weight exercises like pull ups, HSPU, etc. My personal favorite is Diane. 21-15-9 225 dead lifts and HSPU. You won’t die. You’ll just feel like it.

Nanos: Brought to us by Reebok. Direct competition for the Innov-8’s. Favored by CrossFitters For the low height and versatility. Favored by Reebok because of the price. Lots of cool colors and they are customizable if you want to wait two to three months.

Omergawdddd: Common response when someone tries a heavier than normal weight for a dead lift or clean. Also common response when asked “How was the WOD?”

PR: Personal record. We celebrate them all. Could be for the fastest 400 meter, heaviest triple, getting a double under or a rope climb. If the box doesn’t have a PR bell or a board dedicated to track these, find a new box.

Quit: No meaning because it doesn’t exist. Similar to unicorns and Sasquatch. There is no quit.

Rx: Completed as prescribed. Followed the weights and movements with zero substitutions. You graduated.

Sweat Angel: Think snow angel minus the snow. The WOD is over and you crushed it. Assume the position. Flat on your back on the floor, arms and legs sprawled out like a starfish. Eventually the walls will stop shaking. Take a picture and post on Facebook. You accomplished more in an hour than most will do all day.

Turkish Get Ups: Nobody likes these. Evil drill which consists of holding a weight overhead while standing up from the floor and them laying back down. Tutorial

Uberfit: Clothing company which one day may be as big as Under Armour. Clothing for athletes designed by one of our own! You Need A New Shirt

Victory: You did it! Celebrate every win. Ring the bell and track it in the log book.

WTF?: Common thought when the WOD doesn’t make sense or the trainer has an 800 meter run in the warmup.

X-out: What we do to goals. Hit the goal. Cross out the goal. Add a new goal.

Yowsa: Prescribed response when a fellow CrossFitter hits a new PR or when you hit one. It is a team sport. Celebrate everybody’s wins. Best way to cool down? Cheering for the people who aren’t done yet!

Zercher Carry: Carrying a significant amount of weight by making an L with your arms. The barbell or yoke rests in the crook of your arms. Usually carried for 50 to 100 feet.
Example

Links to other CrossFit dictionary’s.

CrossFit Active Performance

Arenal Fitness

CrossFit Manassas

Thank you for reading and have a great day.

Ten Crossfit Truths

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I am coming up on my two year anniversary of CrossFit. “Come on in.” they said. “It’ll be fun.” they said. It has been fun and I have learned a lot. Before I wrote this blog I searched for other blogs with a similar topic and found more entries about CrossFit myths. Below is my take on the truths.

1) CrossFit is not a cult. The best boxes are a community comprised of individuals striving to get better in each of the ten components of CrossFit. No flowing white robes. No Kool-aid. Just people focused on getting better.

2) CrossFit is addictive. I have yet to meet anyone who was not hooked after their first WOD. It hurts. It leaves you gasping, in the fetal position, on the floor. It makes you wonder how the 125 lb woman next to you lifted more, lifted it faster, and isn’t sweating nearly as profusely. It is also fun as hell and provides a sense of accomplishment which is unmatched.

3) CrossFit is contagious. It’s all we talk about. I am sure our friends and family get tired of hearing about it, until they try a WOD. Then it’s on like donkey kong.

4) Not all athletes are “elite”. I hate the word elite. Almost as much as I hate the words epic or slim fit. Froning is elite. Iceland Annie is elite. They also have all day to train, eat, and rest. I am not trying to be the best in the world, only better than who I was yesterday. Most if our trainers are top shelf athletes and I appreciate the dedication. You don’t have to be elite to CrossFit.

5) Competition is powerful. “I can’t do that.” is soon replaced with “Holy hell, I did that!”. Competing against both yourself and others is a sure fire way to get better.

6) CrossFit is expensive. Dues, $150 – $200. Progenex $60. Nanos or Innov8, $90-$125. Reebok, Lululemon or Under Armour shorts, shirts, pants, etc. $$$$$. It is an investment in yourself. Aren’t you worth it? The clothes don’t have a huge impact so save the dollars and invest in the gear like shoes and a custom fit jump rope. A quality post WOD protein is also a good idea.

7) CrossFit does not get easy. It just sucks a little less. The workout is going to punch you square in the throat. Would we want it any other way? It’s only thirty minutes, or less in most cases.

8) The WODS you hate are the WODS you should not miss. Yesterday was a perfect example for me. Nicole. 20 min AMRAP of 400 meter runs and AMRAP pull ups. I hate both, hence I hate Nicole. Don’t skip the stuff at which we suck, as we would never get any better.

9) Nutrition is the foundation. Paleo is preferred by most CrossFitters I know however that does not mean it is the best. Each athlete has to test which plans work the best based on individual needs. Drinking three nights a week while alternating cheeseburgers, pizza, and fried Oreos is not a plan conducive to increased physical performance, sadly.

10) Rest and mobility are important. Lifts, running, rowing, push-ups, etc., all result in torn muscle fibers. That is why we are sore after a workout. Rest and mobility work help heal the tears, making the muscle fibers thicker and tougher. Skipping these is the equivalent if skipping the lift or the workout all together.

11) CrossFitters tend to push harder and want more…..whether it is physically, professionally, or personally. No quitting. No giving up. No time outs. Every rep, set, and round counts. There are no shortcuts. Skip a rep, suffer the wrath.

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Whole Life Challenge

My second trip through Whole Life Challenge is complete. It was a much better experience than the first time. Cheat meals were at a minimum. I lost 13 pounds. Didn’t lose anything in inches which is weird however I am not getting hung up on it.

I was able to shave nearly two minutes off my WOD time which is a 19 percent improvement. Five rounds, 135lb. dead lift for 10 reps followed by fifteen wall balls at 20lbs. First round was 9:50 and my last round was 7:56. Definitely happy about that; however it’s never good enough!

Key Factors:

Meal Planning. Fail to plan, plan to fail. Paleo is inconvenient. Unless you have meals and snacks ready to go, you will wind up hungry or eating something you shouldn’t. Sundays were a day of cooking for the week. We definitely ate out less and saved some money; however grocery store trips were more frequent and more expensive. Not too mention we ran the dishwasher every day!

Exercise. Every day we did something. It can be as easy as taking the dog for a long walk at a faster than normal pace, or yoga, or a serious WOD.

Mobility: I think I spent more time on Mobility WOD than any other site. Do them all! Ten to fifteen minutes every day helps flexibility and your mind. It’s good to unplug or disconnect for a while.

Cheat: we definitely had some cheat days. Beers on opening day. Ice cream after dinner. Take the zero and move on. It helped us stay sane! Well as much as we are anyway.

I am definitely happier about the progress made during our second WLC. Now we just have to keep going. Paleo is the real deal. My first cheat meal after it was done was brown rice on my burrito bowl. REBEL!

Knock it out of the par this week.